The Ant and the Grass Hopper

[countrydiscount]

*OLD VERSION*:

 

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his

house and laying up supplies for the winter.

 

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and

plays the summer away.

 

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

 

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

 

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

 

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*UPDATED VERSION:*

 

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his

house and laying up supplies for the winter.

 

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and

plays the summer away.

 

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and

demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others

are cold and starving.

 

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the

shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable

home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp

contrast.

 

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor

grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

 

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody

cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."

 

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where

the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse

then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's

sake.

 

Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that

the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call

for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

 

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act

retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for

failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having

nothing

left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the

government.

 

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a

defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel

of

federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of

single-parent welfare

recipients.

 

The ant loses the case.

 

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of

the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens

to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't

maintain it.

 

The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in

a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by

a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

 

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote!