shacks510 Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 I need a break from the internet for a few months. Quote Link to comment
Komeuppance Posted October 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 Ha, Nana's Hammock, that's what happens when you steal a car that is too fast for you. (That car was stolen, police chase, crash). BTW, how many of you have bought a car that was from that area... lolol... that one guy claims over 700 to himself, imagine all the others. Probability says your Datsun is tainted in more ways than one. -Robert Quote Link to comment
datzenmike Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 http://dangerousminds.net/comments/man_admits_to_having_sex_with_over_700_cars Man admits to having sex with over 700 cars 10.14.2014 06:20 am Topics: Amusing Sex Tags: Edward Smith car sex Edward Smith, a 63-year-old man from Yelm, Thurston County, Washington, told a live morning TV show that he had made love to over 700 vehicles, including Mustangs, luxury Jaguars and even an attack helicopter. Smith made the admission on the British family television show This Morning, telling hosts Phillip Schofield and Amanda Holden that he was a mechaphile—someone who is sexually attracted to machines—and prefers making love to motors than women. Smith said he had sex with vehicles since first being attracted to his neighbor’s Volkswagon Beetle when he was fourteen, when he was tempted to give the vehicle a “gentle caress.”: “It has to do with the body itself. I’ve not been attached to any sort of penetration, but petting and hugging and feeling the body. I like feeling the satisfaction—masturbation—that’s done with the car, next to it. “When I hold them in my arms, I feel an energy that comes from them. There’s a very deep love.” Smith admitted he had difficulties in forming relationships with women and had only ever had one girlfriend “by some chance” in San Francisco in the early 1970s. However, he found the relationship unsatisfying. Edward now has a long term sex partner that’s still… er… driving him wild, “Vanilla”—another VW Beetle that he bought in 1982. “I first met her before I got her and then had the local Jehovah’s Witness driving around in one. There was something about that white ‘74 Beetle, I couldn’t keep my eyes off her,” he said. “On my own private property is where we get mostly intimate. I’m very respectful not to be seen in public. I greet her every morning along with my truck Ginger.” Smith’s obsession of pulling up to the bumper (baby), and driving it in between tickles the Brits as he has previously appeared in the Daily Mirror last October, where he ‘fessed up to having sex with thousands of cars: “Some guys look at boobs and bums on beautiful women. I look at the front and rear on beautiful cars.” Then he claimed he was in an “open relationship” with his VW Vanilla and makes “love to his 1973 Opal GT called Cinnamon and a 1193 Ford Ranger called Splash.” But Vanilla is ‘the one’ and Edward likes to woo the white-coloured hatchback with picnics and wine-fuelled dates. He added: “When I hold Vanilla in my arms there’s a powerful energy that comes from her. I would say it is extremely satisfying but at times a little melancholy because I know she cannot talk to me. But overall I know she feels what I feel and its intense.” He added: “If anything was to happen to her I would be more than heartbroken.” Smith also admitted in October 2013 that he was occasionally tempted to stray but added: “I know better now than to pursue other people’s private property without permission. I will not deny that I look at other cars on TV or at shows and still get those old impulses and desires - but those were the early days. Now I want to settle down with Vanilla.” He added: “There’s something about her that I can’t fully express on an emotional level except it’s very powerful and very sincere. I’m never ashamed or awkward in my heart. I have never questioned myself - I just love her.” Well, that’s okay then…. https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=9UHi7uQn8GU Besides the obvious cry for attention and likely bullshit story to begin with... this guy has sex with cars and is also the biggest cereal male slut Bukakki douche in the world? ..... Right! Quote Link to comment
510freak Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 You should have just done what those hypocrics do,,, hide it from those not logged in ( most likely their wives cuz they are scared of them) to seem holier than thou. Yeah mom ,, i'm just looking at cars and such. AND Yes i spelled it wrong,, hypodicks just sounded wrong somehow :w00t: Slipping up nanners in your old age Quote Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 Found a National Geographic video about this guy. National Fucking Geographic, people. I thought I'd heard of this guy before. http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/channel/taboo/videos/car-lover/ Quote Link to comment
510freak Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Well I guess it isnt much different than a bunch of Datsun perps oggling over internet boobs and all,with sticky keys :lol: You know, the dimensional effect of a flat screen is only so good right? 2 Quote Link to comment
a.d._510_n_ok Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 ummm......does he actually achieve.....apogee??? Quote Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 You know, the dimensional effect of a flat screen is only so good right? Tell me about it... 1 Quote Link to comment
510freak Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Tell me about it... :lol: Quote Link to comment
KELMO Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Talk about a "used car". Nasty......just nasty. Quote Link to comment
bananahamuck Posted October 20, 2014 Report Share Posted October 20, 2014 :w00t: Slipping up nanners in your old age Oh i'm slippin alright ,, slippin it to your MOM 2 Quote Link to comment
a.d._510_n_ok Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Oh i'm slippin alright ,, slippin it to your MOM looks like my ex-wife is trying to get back into shape - GOOD FOR HER!!! 3 Quote Link to comment
Guest Rick-rat Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 http://dangerousminds.net/comments/man_admits_to_having_sex_with_over_700_cars Besides the obvious cry for attention and likely bullshit story to begin with... this guy has sex with cars and is also the biggest cereal male slut Bukakki douche in the world? ..... Right! Guest speaker at the fest in Monroe on the 1st, WTF is a cereal slut, kind of like a cereal killer, EH! Quote Link to comment
510freak Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Oh i'm slippin alright ,, slippin it to your MOM :rofl: See,Mom jokes,you slipping bad :lol: damn old age Quote Link to comment
HRH Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Aww man, that car crash was a Starion/Conquest. I love those cars, even if they are Mitsubishi. :( 1 Quote Link to comment
izzo Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Enumclaw is also where dude got railed by a horse and died. That town is full of inbread hillbillies Quote Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Enumclaw is also where dude got railed by a horse and died. That town is full of inbread hillbillies And he was a Boeing engineer. Think about that next time you step on board an airplane. 1 Quote Link to comment
datzenmike Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 There are probably gay, lesbian, black, alcoholic, democratic and smoker engineers too. Quote Link to comment
datzenmike Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Guest speaker at the fest in Monroe on the 1st, WTF is a cereal slut, kind of like a cereal killer, EH! cereal MALE slut, rick. Quote Link to comment
Guest Rick-rat Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Serial MALE slut, rick.Fixed, I kill cereal every morning Quote Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 There are probably gay, lesbian, black, alcoholic, democratic and smoker engineers too. True, but they all have more sense than to take a horse cock up the ass. (Generally speaking, of course.) Quote Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 "This vehicle has components engineered by a gay, black, alcoholic democrat who smokes". Huh. Okay. "This vehicle has components engineered by a guy who had his colon ripped to shreds by a horse's cock." Uh.... maybe I'll just take a cab. Never mind I'm going to London... Quote Link to comment
datzenmike Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 An engineer is an engineer. Quote Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Perhaps my feelings toward bestiality make me question the guy's competence as an engineer. WHY that is, I have no idea. :unsure: 1 Quote Link to comment
q-tip Posted October 21, 2014 Report Share Posted October 21, 2014 Enumclaw is also where dude got railed by a horse and died. That town is full of inbread hillbillies And a pickle factory!.... well....former pickle factory..... Quote Link to comment
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